Desert Song

Lately I've been feeling a little like things are spinning out of control. I've felt so distant from everything. Sometimes I feel like I'm losing myself to nothing in particular. I put so much into school, and on top of that find myself doing most other things simply for the sake of being busy. But where does that leave me? I'm still trying to figure that out. God has been blessing me with so much passion for school and what I'm doing in the hospital. The stress there is pretty minimal too, which is another blessing in itself. Last weekend at Desperation was amazing. God really showed up and spoke to my heart in ways that I hadn't anticipated. But aside from that there's still been something of a disconnect. There are a million things running through my mind right now and unfortunately they're still moving to fast to interpret. Maybe I tend to get content with feeling this way? Or maybe I give up too quick to fight back. Either way, I decided it's not important.

I was listening to Pandora today and Desert Song by Hillsong United came on. The timing was more or less perfect.

This is my prayer in the desert
When all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in my hunger and need
My God is the God who provides
This is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved of more worth than gold
So refine me, Lord, through the flame

The attitude of this song is so beautiful. And unfortunately I've been missing it. Regardless of where I'm at or how I feel I know the Truth. I know that even when I find myself in the desert there's still something to sing about. I just have to keep seeking him despite my circumstances. Because I know he is faithful and he is so worthy. And he promises restoration.

"Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security. I will bring Judah and Israel back from captivity and will rebuild them as they were before. I will cleanse them from all the sin they have committed against me and will forgive all their sins of rebellion against me. Then this city will bring me renown, joy, praise and honor before all nations on earth that hear of all the good things I do for it; and they will be in awe and will tremble at the abundant prosperity and peace I provide for it." - Jeremiah 33:6-9